Month: July 2016

Dunmore East Golf Club, June ’16 (1/4)

My goodness! Is that Guinness?

It was a another swelteringly hot day in the Sunny South-East & I’d been out & about with the whole family just basking in it. Unfortunately for all concerned, due to the outrageous heat, I had inadvertently locked us out of the holiday home. So, having had to take a wander to track down a ladder, I was sweaty as fork by the time the auld one climbed in an upstairs window to let everyone in. I was bloody parched! I deserved a cool, smooth pint of The Good BlacknWhite.

Thankfully, the clubhouse of the Dunmore East Golf Club was a mere 20 yards from the holiday home so I got to the bar & ordered fairly lively. The pint only cost around €4 so that was a great start. It couldn’t come fast enough the thirst on me but to my abject disappointment it landed in front of me with a bubbly head. Gutted I was, but seeing as I was gasping for a drink I just had to get into it asap. Immediately upon first taste I got squinty-wince-face. The was no mistaking this one, it was all round off.

Dunmore East GC 7 Jun 16 head
Bubbles everywhere. Creaminess severely lacking.

My second attempt confirmed its mankiness as the wincing progressed & my face contorted. Had I not seen it poured myself I would well have thought it was the slops; horrendous it was. I struggled on, each sup worse than the last. By the time I got halfway we had gone from a fluffy to a pencil-tache head; it was time to call it. This was up there with the worst of them & was no longer drinkable. Why pretend you sell Guinness when you actually sell some shite? Just don’t bother. They have pint bottles of Harp, if yer ever here, go there!

Dunmore East GC 7 Jun 16 2
No thank you

The Haven Hotel, Dunmore East, Co Waterford, June ’16 (2/4)

Not Guinness Time, Not Here Anyway

I don’t know how it is for everyone else, but when I’m on my holidays all I can think about is a nice cool pint. Lounging around is lovely; wandering on walks is wonderful; family fun n frolics in freezing seas is fantastic, but all the time on my mind is to find somewhere to enjoy a pint of the smooothest, coolest, creamiest Goodness. Mmmmm, just the thought of it.

It was a blisteringly hot day & I was on on me jollies in the sunny South-East & I was gagging to get a taste of the local attempt. To my delight, my auld pair said they knew a lovely spot with a great view that was perfect for some afternoon refreshment. The sun was splitting the pebbles in front of this period house hotel so we opted for a picnic table with amazing views across the bay to Hook head. The scene was most certainly set, it was missing just one thing. I ordered the pint but was too busy bringing drinks to the family to stay n view the Settler so it was ready n waiting upon my return. I wobble-tested & to my disappointment found a watery cheann. To add to this, the first thing my aul lad said when I sat down was “oooh, awwww, doesn’t look great that”! Irish auld lads probably just know, it’s intuition; you get to a certain age and you just have the-Knowledge-of-the-G. He was right, there were a good few tiny bubbles in the head; a bad omen. There was no lip-flop, twas more like what happens with the head of a beer, and as I tasted it I knew, I just knew the taste had lived up to the look and feel. I even tried to pretend it was half decent the second time I went at it but I had to give up, it just tasted off & my idyllic view was tainted. Too much carbon dioxide I’d say if pushed, but definitely not good enough. Get a beer if you want to enjoy the view but my advice is go somewhere else where the G-punters are treated with the respect they deserve.